Reader Mailbag: Favorite Tools and Amazon Shopping List

“What are your favorite toys?”
                            –Random Internet Stranger

To use or to receive…? 

     I don’t call them “toys”, I’m too serious-minded.  I call them tools or implements.  

    I like to use my hands.  The touch is very intimate.  Grind, pinch, poke, probe, slap, punch.  Dig my thumbs into pressure points.  Pressure, the application of pressure…

     On that note: there is something very fun and exciting about pinning a man with my weight.  I have no idea what, aside from the symbolism, but it feels good.  I like to curl up astride his chest like a cat who’s going to steal his soul, and get some good eye contact. 

     I like the belt and the cane.   The Dread Wooden Hairbrush of Doom adds a feminine element to the beating.  I  like to do that whilst wearing a satin nightie and short robe, in front of my vanity with all the mysterious feminine potions–makeup, perfume–on the counter. I would never hit a child, but I would hit you.

      I like wooden tools. 

      I’m not big into floggers unless they are very, very heavy.  A soft but very heavy flogger made from elk suede is a bone cruncher and produces tremendous sensation without much tissue damage.  One of my clients, Fortinbras, has such a flogger.  I’ve never felt anything like it.

       I like asphixiation.  It’s one of the only fetishes I have that I feel guilty about, because I know it’s dangerous and stupid as hell.  FWIW, I never do it when I’m alone, and I refuse to do it with clients.  And yes, it kills brain cells.  But damn if it doesn’t feel good. 

       When I receive, I prefer to take the violence on my upper back.  That is my favorite place to be hit.  Most people prefer the buttocks, but not me. 

      I like to use clothespins, binder clips, and plastic claw-clips for hairdos.  This is sort of weird because I personally hate crushing sensations.  But damned if they aren’t fun to use on men. 

     Clothes: boots and leather and metal.  Or old-fashioned lingerie. I am definitely a leather domme rather than a latex domme.  

      I like rope. 

     “Why don’t you have an Amazon Wishlist?”
                                               –the Same Random Internet Stranger

       I’m too modest to ask strangers to buy me stuff.  Also, if you are an asshole, gift-giving is a form of bribery and emotional manipulation.  My restraining-order Ex, John, would bully me with money all the time. 

       I am not accusing you of being an asshole.  I’m just saying that I’m skeptical of getting something for nothing.  But then, I write this blog for free and 8 people read it, so there you go.

      My domme friend, Mistress C, says that I am a “fucking retard” for not making men buy me stuff, but for some reason this feels degrading to me. I cannot tell you why it feels degrading.  Is it because I am allergic to entitlement?  Or do I have proper perspectives reversed in my head?

     I can tell you about stuff that actually IS on my (private) Amazon shopping list:
     Rome: A Cultural, Visual, and Personal History, by Robert Hughes.


    American Police Equipment: A Guide to Early Restraints, Clubs, and Lanterns, by Matthew G. Forte

       Spyderco Delica 4 Folding Plain Edge FRN Knife

    Initial Letter M 14K Yellow Gold Disk Pendant Necklace


Posters of the WPA


7 thoughts on “Reader Mailbag: Favorite Tools and Amazon Shopping List”

  1. Asphyx gives a huge rush and is addictive, but it’s a young person’s game. The older you get, the greater the risk of an unpleasant cardiovascular event. I’m sort of grateful that my Mistress won’t have anything to do with it, which made my decision to give it up easy.

    WRT your wishlist, the late Robert Hughes is hugely impressive. His ‘The Shock of the New’ is one of the best introductions to modern art that can be found.

    1. “Unpleasant cardiovascular event” is quite a euphemism. Do you mean the pinprick hemorrhages…? Or, say, death…?

      I’m definitely a Hughes fan, though the dark side of his personality troubles me. That is not for me to judge, however.

      I’ve watched “The Shock of the New” and “The New Shock of the New” and “American Visions” and everything else I could find on YouTube or the internet. He’s strange because he’s highly intelligent and bourgeois, but he has a populist streak in him. He’s not a snob.

      God, he was talented.

      “The Fatal Shore” was fantastic, too. It was excellent journalism and research, but it also contained the intimate quality of fiction…I felt the emotional voice of the author. He had a compassion and empathy for the oppressed that I find very admirable and persuasive.

      He reminds me a little of George Orwell.

      I love his takedown of Warhol. And whoever that guy was who suspended an embalmed shark in a tank. I laughed so hard.

      Thank you for reading,


  2. Which spyderco…?
    The “Last Ditch” is legal because the blade is less than 4″, but even if it wasn’t, after the house call I no longer have any fucks to give…

    “Don’t worry. I’m not going to cut you, Margo,” he says. Uh-huh.

  3. FWIW I would get you the WPA posters book. Actually two, one for myself. I love that type of art. If you like the posters I’m also willing to guess that you enjoy many of the frescos that were put up in many of the public buildings like libraries and post offices built by the WPA. There is a terrific example in the Minneapolis Armory. Art like that probably wouldn’t be possible in public buildings today. Someone would complain that it is too “socialist”.


  4. Hi Mike;

    I do like WPA art and I appreciate the civic capital and attitude promoted in the posters. It’s propaganda, but it’s totally transparent. Contemporaneous critics found it socialist or Marxist, but if you study the art and propaganda produced by the USSR, it’s pretty obvious that the comparison is shallow and not particularly apt. They both promote an agenda of social engineering and and a glamorization of labor, but the cultures are fundamentally different, and it shows in the art. Russia has never had a democratic society. Aside from some of the Revolution-drunk art produced in the 1920s (some of which was truly breathtaking), Russian propaganda was very heavy on thought control and the idolization of The Great Leader/The Party. The American stuff is different. It’s too complex to adequately address in this comment…but I’d LOVE to teach a class on 20th Century propaganda. I’ve written several papers about it.

    Thank you for offering to buy me the book. I’ll consider it. For now, I am too shy, but I hope you know that is not a personal rejection.

    As always, thanks for reading.


    1. Hi Margo,

      I don’t take it as a personal rejection at all. To be honest I wasn’t very clear in what I meant. What I really meant to say was that if you had a wishlist and if I was so inclined to buy something from it the WPA book would be the gift because of a shared interest.


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