Work Cell Phone (“Mistress Batphone”): Pay-as-you-go burner Tracfone from Target
Private Cell Phone: Samsung Galaxy S6
Tin of Altoid Smalls, peppermint flavor
Chapstick, cherry flavored
Mascara, Cover Girl Lash Blast Volume in brownish-black
Miniature travel toothbrush with case
Ballpoint pens, 4 (four), all from different hotels
Hotel room key-cards, 3 (three), all from different hotels
Naltrexone, 3 (three) pills, in a zipper compartment
Compact mirror purchased at Mauritshuis in The Hague , depicting Girl With a Pearl Earring (c.1665)
Tampons, 2 (two)
Crumpled Used Kleenex, 2 (two)
Lipsticks, 3 (three): nude (Victoria’s Secret), cool fuscia (Sephora), cool red (Wet n’ Wild)
B1 complex with Folic Acid vitamins, 4 (four), because my last alcoholic relapse wrecked my health and I need these vitamins to get it back. Doctor’s orders. I eat them like pez. If you are an alcoholic, you really need to get on B1 with folic acid as soon as possible.
Condoms, 8 (eight): 2 Skyn Polyisoprene (non-latex), 2 good-ole-Trojan, 2 Skyn Polyisoprene “large,” 2 Kimono brand All for clients on outcalls, alas
A shit-ton of heavy change that needs to go in the change jar and be taken to CoinStar.
My wallet, which is printed with van Gogh’s Almond Blossom (c. 1890).
ATM receipts, four (4)
Ticket to the Legion of Honor
Bandages to keep my still-healing burn wounds concealed
Kohl eyeliner, one (1), brown “espresso”