Reader Mailbag: Genius Wants to Know, “WHY THE BUS, HOT SHIT ‘DOMME'”?

Ah yes, a snarky anonymous (of course) email, from the reader mailbag.  It’s about a paragraph long, but I’ll quote the most relevant sentence, which nicely summarizes my correspondent’s opinion (or whatever it is…mostly insult and invective):

“If you’re a hot shit ‘beautiful’ domme making more money out there in San Francisco than you did in New York, why are you taking the bus to travel there, and constantly bitching about it?”

I should not even be responding to this…but here you go, anonymous reader.  Take pride in this moment: you get some free attention from a woman men find desirable and talented enough to spend $300/hour to spend time with her.  And I have never ONCE described myself as “beautiful” on this blog or in my ad copy, even though my clients, and the multitudinous boyfriends I’ve had over the years, seem to think I am.  My pictures speak for themselves; they are almost entirely un-photoshopped.  I am grateful that I am conventionally attractive, because it’s opened doors for me, but my only vanity is intellectual.

I take the bus because it costs between $12-$30/ticket and if I drive, gas is at least $65 round trip (I’ve paid $80) and valet/parking garage is $35-$90 night in Union Square (don’t forget to tip the valet attendant–that’s another $3-$5).  Do the math, if you can generate enough energy from rubbing your one and a half brain cells together.  The bus has wifi and power outlets, which work about half the time, and I can snooze and be fresh for work by the time I get to the hotel.  I have to get up at 4:30 AM.

My car is not a fucking Bugatti.  It’s a Toyota Camry and it runs like a top (Japanese engineering, man, can’t beat it for poor-man’s cars) and I maintain it, but it’s also old and if it dies going over the mountains, I’m waiting for AAA tow service and paying hundreds and hundreds of $ at the nearest mechanic and losing an entire day of work and possibly staying overnight, at personal expense, at whatever motel is nearby.

Finally, only true American aristocracy (which I’m sure you’re not) or rich people from super-status-conscious backwards countries like Saudi Arabia consider taking the bus, train, bicycle, moped, or any form of non-private-car embarrassing or something to be ashamed of.  Plenty of millionaires in New York and Washington DC take the subway.  Many of my wealthiest clients–and the Surgeon–had MetroCards.

….and even saying that sounds like Respectability Politics, which I regret, and which is worthy of self-examination.

There’s nothing wrong with riding the bus, and you sound like an idiot for trying to shame me for it.



5 thoughts on “Reader Mailbag: Genius Wants to Know, “WHY THE BUS, HOT SHIT ‘DOMME'”?”

  1. I feel angry on your behalf.

    Public transport is perfectly respectable! And why spend money you don’t need to!!

    GAH! Jackass.

    1. Hi Lurker!

      (Nothing wrong with Lurking. I leave comments all over the internet, but I lurk a lot, too.)

      He is, indeed, a jackass. The source of his anger is not difficult to see: it’s based on the assumption that sex workers are rich (which is mostly just marketing) and that we charge “too much” (which means he’s a client, and probably not a client anyone sees twice). If I wrote that I was driving to SF in my Audi, he would send exactly the same email, only accusing me of being vain and flashy. Can’t win with these guys.

      Thanks for reading, Lurker.

    1. Hi Craven. Sorry it’s taken me so long to reply. I was traveling and did not have privacy to monitor this blog.

      I’m a huge fan of you and your work, and I am grateful that you keep in touch, even when I’m not at my best (to say the least). My life would be less without you in it.

      You know the rest.

  2. On one hand you should not have answered published this assholes quote and answered him but that was interesting. The economics and logic of it, especially about the risk of breakdown in the mountains and it’s consequenses of which I am well aware. Much cheaper ,easier and less stressful to sit back and let someone else drive if you didn’t need a car in SF, especially in the winter.


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