Breakup Update

     For the last three nights I have dreams complex, vivid dreams.  Very strange content matter.  Some of it was new material, which is interesting.  Although they were not nightmares, the dreams were mostly unpleasant in tone–even the sex parts, and usually sex dreams are awesome. I woke up feeling disoriented and a little upset.  


     The Surgeon backed off a little bit and I thought that the worst was over, and then he sent me something in the mail.  Not sure what to do with it or how to respond (or whether I should respond at all–probably not).  


    I told my friend about it.


   “It’s a bribe!  A bribe!” She declared, reminding me:  “He’s a sick fuck!”  


    Ah, indeed it is, and indeed he is, and I am in a vulnerable position right now, and so very bribable.  


    My emotions cannot be trusted and my frustrated sexuality is being a total pain in the ass.  It is just so unacceptable.  If I wanted to be sexually frustrated, I’d get married.  


    I was advised by another M.D. that I could get the Surgeon off my back in two seconds if I complained about him to his professional organization.  This is excellent advice that I will file away for safekeeping, but it’s a last resort, for obvious reasons.




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